Calling out the negative coping mechanisms for my stress without judgement.

pray.

…I would say that I should probably do more of this. Or at least do more silent, intentional prayer. I am definitely praying all throughout the day for my patients and for continual strength from God to do what I need to do, but to be with the Beloved in a quiet space is a rare occasion these days, and I know that it is in my control to change that.

What I think I really need to clean up is my night routine. The hardest thing these days is coming home exhausted and wanting to “turn my brain off,” so I turn to social media or talking to friends or watching an assortment of Youtube videos (other people eating or working out or talking about God usually). I KNOW THIS IS NOT THE ANSWER. But I’ve been doing it anyway in an attempt to fill myself.

Guess what. It’s not working super well.

My face is broken out in acne; my cortisol levels shoot me up at around 7am even if I want to sleep in; my workouts feel really difficult; I sometimes find myself stress eating. None of this is first-time experience, and I know that the sources are a) stress from work; b) lack of quality time with God. One of these can be changed, for sure, if I really want it. And I do.

I am grateful that, at this point in my life, I can call out these negative coping mechanisms of mine without being hard on myself. I am also grateful for these seasons of stress and adjustment that remind me of my weakness and the need to rely on God c o m p l e t e l y.

Something that helps me with bouncing back from negative coping mechanisms is to “just say yes to the next good thing.” Whether that’s putting down the phone at 9:00pm, taking out the trash the night before instead of almost forgetting in the morning, turning off the TV Youtube while I’m eating dinner, etc. Say yes to ONE next good thing. Just one.

eat.

The best thing I ate last week was chicken saag with garlic naan and basmati rice from a local Indian restaurant. My brother picked it up for us + his girlfriend on Thursday night, and we had a lovely socially distanced dinner in the backyard. It made for two delicious meals, which is the best 🙂

move.

I’ve still been loving the outdoor KB workouts on Sundays hosted by @kettlebellgains_apparel. I didn’t go this weekend because I needed a bit of rest (aka napped too long and was a sort of too late lol) and wanted to catch up with family over video chat, but most Sundays I try to make it down there for awesome community and HEAVY kettlebell work!

Otherwise, my workouts have been mostly strength/mobility-based and pretty low key. I’ve been telling my patients, “I work out so I can do this [physical therapy]!” And I mean it.

groove.

On Friday night, I got home late so I ran up and down the stairs blasting uplifting praise and worship to sing, dance, and work up a sweat ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ whatever works.

On Saturday, I met up with my apartment-mate from last year, Yuka! She loooooves NYC, so I gave her a little tour of some of my favorite spots, some new-to-me spots, and some of her requested spots. It was a day of 29K+ steps, lots of carbs, and good friend time! Masked and outdoors only, of course.

It was fun writing a good old blog post again. This always helps to ground me. Thank you, as always, for reading along on this 7+ year journey.

So tell me:

Do you find yourself using “negative” coping mechanisms at times? How do you try to bring yourself out of those?

What are some things that ground you during stressful/challenging times?

Do you like Indian food? Fave dish? What is the best thing you did this weekend?

Nothing is ever as expected (theme of the year?).

pray.

Things have changed and moved very quickly in my life the past week or so. Nothing huge, but definitely important. Thus, a lot of my prayer has been sheer surrender to God, asking Him to take care of everything.

Surrender to God does not mean be a potato and wait for God to do everything for you. His plan requires our cooperation, and most importantly our free will. But to surrender is to let go of expectation, willing to let go of desires for a greater good, and trust that whatever happens, He is with you.

So that’s been a big part of my prayer this week.

eat.

Yesterday was national potato day, so I air fried some Ore-Ida tater tots and crinkle cut fries as a (large) part of my dinner last night and ooooo baby I was happy.

move.

Last evening, I ran for the first time (continuously) since coming back to NY. The weather has been wonderful here this week, so I figured running in the neighborhood would be a good way to enjoy it while also doing something good for my cardiovascular system.

It was a slowwww 4 miles, but I’m making myself feel better by saying my neighborhood is hilly.

groove.

I have accepted my first big girl job offer! The new-grad-in-COVID-era job search has been the roller coaster that prompted the prayers stated above. The job for which I signed was not the job I thought I would take if you asked me 5 days ago, but nothing is as expected. Some doors close, some doors remain open, and some doors you choose to not walk through.I have a couple weeks before starting, so I’m trying to soak up this relative free time and prepare myself to practice physical therapy finally!

I’ll share more about this after I start the job, but please pray for me and my patients to come!

Nothing is as expected, which is a big theme of 2020… and honestly a big theme of my life. I should know that by now 🙂

So tell me:

What are some unexpected things that have happened to you recently?

Did you eat potatoes yesterday?

What are your weekend plans?