Three pieces of “news” for you:
1) I finished a Costco-sized jar of peanut butter [almost] all by myself in less than a month.
finished it off with some [cooled] microwave oats
2) I’m currently eating with chopsticks in the dining hall because Asians are not really a minority at BU, and this dining hall has responded to that.
3) THIS Buzzfeed post about socially awkward introverts hits home like no other.
Do you think trying and crying rhyme because of me?
Now, if you know me in person, you might not immediately call me an introvert. I love talking to people and I even enjoy public speaking. That being said, it takes a great deal of energy for me to be social, and I’m usually quite content eating a meal by myself. (Not just because I was temporarily mortified after last year’s salad explosion.)
In addition to liking my “me time,” my introverted-ness is evident in my straight up AWKWARDNESS around people.
Sometimes, making good eye contact while talking with someone one-on-one is harder than looking into the sun.
When I contribute to a group conversation, I often doubt myself and make my voice progressively quieter and more high-pitched. And then I laugh like a teenage witch.
Sometimes I’m tempted to give up on saying hi to people in large groups.
Keeping up with conversation without falling into boring small talk can result in me making many sentences and gestures that make no sense at all.
But I’ve realized a few things:
a) If I let the awkward things come and go and pretend that I don’t feel my soul isn’t shriveling into itself, the awkwardness usually subsides more quickly.
b) The only way people can laugh WITH you is if you laugh at yourself.
c) Confidence really is the best thing you can wear.
d) Nobody cares that much about what I do or say. No one judges me harder than I judge myself.
e) I’m not alone in all this.
So that time I nearly smash my butt slipping down the stairs behind a girl I don’t know…
…or that time I didn’t know what to say at the end of a group prayer except, “and… thank you.”…
…or those multiple times when my brain and mouth do not collaborate properly, and. I. just. talklikethisbecausemywords.don’t.work…
…I’m just gonna own it.
In other news, I’m going to the gynecologist again early this morning. I think we’ll be going over test results from last week and possibly doing some other tests. Thank you all again for your support and prayers!
And here are some eats from this week. I’ve been more a three square meals kinda gal lately with class scheduling and such. Therefore, each meal is pretty epic.
oatmeal with honey, cinnamon, banana, and peanut butter + eggs and turkey bacon
salad with feta and honey mustard dressing + chicken and rice
salad with tuna and couscous + chicken and sweet potatoes
fish cake with corn + salad + turkey burger with feta
vegan pumpkin bread a la mode
Yo gurl can EAT.
Hope you all have a fabulous Friday and a great weekend ahead!
So tell me:
Any awkward antics?
Any recent embarrassing stories you’re willing to share?
What is the best thing you ate this week? Definitely the pumpkin bread a la mode for me!
20 thoughts on “Owning It”
Your food looks incredible, I am all for the big portions haha!! I am always awkward haha, but I guess i’ve learned to laugh at myself more which helps other people laugh with me and kind of get over the whole awkward scenario! The best thing I ate this week has to be a giant cauliflower cheese pizza from this amazing pizzeria in London. It was beyond words!!! Hope you have a lovely day girl:)
Was that a cauliflower crust pizza??
nope haha, it just was pizza with cauliflower cheese on top. The bomb. haha
Haha I think we all feel awkward sometimes! I’m more of an extrovert but some situations still make me feel awkward!!
That pumpkin bread sounds soo good!
I feel endlessly awkward in group situations, but I’m allll for the idea of just owning it. I am who I am, and I’m pretty happy with that 🙂 Also, your college food looks pretty incredible – totally jealous!
Oh gosh that Buzzfeed article was so perfect! I liked the door one especially. I’ve done that so many times, and then I pull the “let’s pretend that didn’t happen” attitude. Oh, and one about not being abls to sleep because of something embarrassing that happened a long time ago. I can’t even count those times. I know I shouldn’t but I can’t help it sometimes. I am agree with owning my awkwardness, but it’s easier said than done for me. 😀 I think I should write down your four points and stick it somewhere where I can see it all the time. I need those reminders every day!
I know I have awkward moments, but I can’t think of any particularly significant ones right now. 🙂
I think the best thing I’ve eaten this week was chocolate banana fudge that I made. It was ok warm and room temp, but is is addictively fudgey when it’s refrigerated. Yum.
“Let’s pretend that didn’t happen” ➔ ALL the time.
Chocolate banana fudge!? Where is this recipe?
I saw it in a link love post a few weeks ago, and I knew I had to make it because I ❤ anything fudge. 😀 Although there were a couple things in the recipe (like the pan size!) that were left out, it still turned out very tasty! They were pretty good warm and at room temp (they seemed more brownie-like), but they became addictive when I refrigerated them.
Lol!!! Omgosh never seen anything so accurate in my life😂🙈
I get so tongue tied when I’m speaking to new people or group. People wonder why I’m so quiet but I’m literally having conversations…just in my brain lol
Ahh the struggle is real!
Have a great weekend and sending lots of love and prayers for you!!
Haha! “conversations…just in my brain” ➔ same.
Thank you, Katie! Praying for you too xoxo
So funny and you are right that no one judges you harder than you judge yourself! I always try to remind myself of this! I honestly think awkwardness is funny and whenever I find myself being awkward, I just call myself out on it and then we can both laugh and move on. Good luck at the doctor ❤ praying for you.
That buzzfeed just got posted on my facebook, and I am very selective when it comes to putting buzzfeed things on facebook.
I love that you are so young and yet have such a brilliant grasp of 90s pop culture references.
To be 100% honest, I just looked up a bunch of gifs that were “awkward.” But I do know that Seinfeld and Friends are included here! 🙂
honesty appreciated…maybe i loved the 90s so much because they were so full of gif-able awkwardness
I’m all sorts of awkward! And it used to be something I was really self-conscious about until I realized that I was making it worse by looking at it under a microscope. You’re 100% that confidence is the best thing you can wear, and that no one judges us as harshly as we judge ourselves. Hope the doctor visit went okay!
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your introvertedness describes me almost perfectly. i had a rough senior year (HS) & freshman year (College- didnt make many friends), and at first didnt like that i was an introvert, then towards the middle of last year, i learned to love it. i especially treasure my meals alone and its almost weird eating with others, but i’m loving being a bit more social. i SO wish we had chopsticks! putting in that request.
It’s true that the more you embrace your awkwardness, the easier it becomes to socialize. People laugh with you! 🙂
I am the worst when it comes to leaving voice mail… I can never work out what to say and I end up rambling on for ages before apologising and eventually hanging up. People must have a good laugh over my messages!
I also hate saying goodbyes, especially big ones. I suddenly get really shy (so not me) and would rather just slip out when at a party or gathering rather than having to say goodbye – always find it so awkward!